Feeling like High School

I've been on Twitter for a bit more than a year now. At the beginning it was incredibly interesting just to read tweets.
After a while I wanted to participate in discussions. I thought I could just throw in my comments and it'll be as much fun for me as it was (apparently) for the others. So I made comments, remarks and I tried to be positive. I really tried. Sure, I met a few really nice people who actually responded if I had questions but didn't the media say that on Twitter everyone can meet hundreds of new friends? Huh...everyone except for me, I guess.

I had to realize, that Twitter is like High School. The more popular you are, the more fun you have.

There are groups on twitter, like the mommybloggers, or the funny/sarcastic/ whatever mom's or weight loss groups and so many more. As someone who doesn't live in the US or Canada or another big country it is really hard to find people on twitter. Besides, English is not my mother tongue, and I guess people notice that (I apologize for all the grammar mistakes I've done until now OK? Geez.)
I have nothing agains't social media (puh-lease, I'm a facebook-addict) but when you're not in some sort of group, Twitter is probably not as much fun; less people help you when you have a problem. Less people notice when you make a huge announcement. And of course there are less comments on your blog. I spend hours with commenting, even if the blog is crappy (and yes, I know that you probably consider my blog as one of those).

I feel like in High School again. A loner in a community that consists thousands of people.

Maybe it's just me. Am I really that boring/annoying/uninteresting?

My wedding

November 13th was the day X.

I got married.

I was so nervous I nearly threw up. Yeah, nice way of saying "Yes", huh?

But everything turned out very well. The ceremony, the reception and just the whole day were absolutely awesome and perfect. I wouldn't have it any other way.

My bridesmaids

left to right: My cousin Amélie, my sister-in-law Jessica and my best friend Anne

the flower girl Lisa

 

where we held the party (an awesome one, by the way)

the church in which we got married

Our wedding cake
which was so incredibly yummy!!!!

For yesterday's memories

today's love

and

tomorrow's dreams

Are you ready fro *the* new life?

"Are you ready for marriage?" I asked my friend Ali. Me and my best friend Anne had lunch in a  bistro with him. We wanted to support him, since he was going to marry in a few days. He's a muslim and hasn't lived with a woman before. EVER.
He looked at me, puzzled. "Of course I'm ready", he hissed and put a napkin on his knees. "I already bought a second pillow!"
    Anne and I glanced at each other and bursted out laughing. We knew our friend had a very faint idea of how marriage really works and how it would be to share one's life with another person. He only thought about himself, typical for him.
    "Fatima is the the calm one in our relationship. I'm more like...the boss. She understands. We agreed on that." Ali exclaimed.
"None of us three is the calm one in our relationships" added Anne. "We're always the bad ones. But that doesn't matter. Things could change you know, Ali...."
    "Yeah," I added. "You could already throw away all your CD's , for example. Cause your fiancée will probably think that they're appalling."
"And you should always, at any rate, have a phone, a phone card or a lot of chump change with you so you can call her wherever you are!" said Anne.
    "And instead of listening to music while falling asleep, you're gonna hear soft waves or jungle sounds instead" I quipped.  "Women need that. I, for example, like the sound of the fan."
"Oooh yeah," said Anne, "I have the waves-cd. And you won't go to an after-work party again. The alternative is: Dinner at home."
    I nodded. "And once you're home from work you'll have to ask her if you wanna go out again."
"EXCEPT" chipped Anne in, "when she sends you to the grocery store."
    "Except she sends you to the grocery store." I agreed.
"And don't fool yourself with the mail. You'll never have it in your hands first EVER AGAIN." said Anne. "Your mail will always be checked, until the day you die."
    "And after your wedding you'll never be as happy at home as you were before. You'll like your office way more." said Anne.
"Exactly," I said, "and if she laughed about your jokes until now, she faked it." I warned him.
    "And if you've told a story once, you shouldn't tell it a second or third time," Anna explained, "cause with every repitition she'll hate you a little bit more."
"In two years she won't be bound to have sex with you anymore" I claimed. "But if you're a lucky one, and she still wants to, then you should be very, very thankful."
    "And try not to say things like 'Yes, baby, do it...' or 'Give it to me, bitch' " Anna pleaded, "And on't wake her up in the middle of the night just because your....male sex drive is creeping over."

Ali looked at us for a while and tried to memorize what we said. I saw how he knit his brows and the corners of his mouth went...downwards. I already thought he'd start to cry and I kinda panicked. Did we exaggerate a little too much?  Had we been too honest? Did we shock him too much? Had we gone too far? Would he cancel the weding now? I looked at Anna and I knew she had the exact same thoughts.

What had we done?!?! We really were the bad ones!

    "Maybe you girls are right," Ali said, " Maybe I'm not ready for marriage yet. How could I've been so stupid? What did I think?! I must've gone nuts!"

Anna and I didn't know what to say. We were just sitting there, a bit freake out. Our mouths were half open and we were ready to protest. WHAT HAD WE DONE?!?!

    "I admit it, I don't have a second pillow! I admit it!" Ali explained and stamped his foot. Then he looked at us and smiled wickedly.

I love my friends  :-)

UPDATE: When I started writing this post my life was still normal. Barely did I know that it would change so soon! My boyfriend proposed! I'm officially engaged!

Can you see the irony here? ;-)

My bucket list

"It is important to have an aim in life!"

My great-grandma tells me this, everytime we see each other. She's 85 now and she is my idol. She is such an incredibly strong woman. She was born 1930. She's always been a pretty wild girl. She refused to marry and when she got pregnant (18 years old, still unmarried, wich was, as you can think, a SCANDAL!) her parents kicked her out.

She found herself a job in a factory. She raised my grandpa all by herself. Until this day, she has never been married. But she was together with a guy for over 50 years. She always believed in herself and she never cared what people said.

You might think otherwise, but for me she is a hero. I've always been scared of not finding a Mr. Right and that I'll never marry. But now I realized that my worries were of no avail. I mean, it would be really nice to get married and stuff, but it's not the end of the world if I don't.

My great-grandma has a wonderful life, she always had. And so will I. I believe in that.

I saw the movie 'The bucket list' and it made me think of my great-grandma. I decided to create my own list.

My bucket list

#1: Go to New York

I love this city. I've seen thousands of pictures and I'm amazed by them. I just love the skyline by night, all these wonderful lights and the Statue of Liberty. In my imagination, I walk through the streets at night and I listen to Frank Sinatra's "New York, New York" on my iPod. I know, it's cheesy, but it's my dream.

Have you guys seen the movie with Macaulay Culkin, where he's alone in New York? (I'm sorry, I don't know how the movie's called in english. But I guess you know which one I mean...) Anyways, I would also love to see that huge christmas tree in front of that Plaza Hotel....*sigh*

Oh, and let's not forget the naked cowboy! :)

#2: (In case I'll marry one day) I wanna have a huge, big-time wedding

Oh yeah folks, I'm one of those. Those girls who dream of a super-corny wedding. I'd love to have a wonderful white wedding dress, "Here comes the bride" when I'm walked down the aisle by my dad, white roses everywhere, white doves flying into the sky when the ceremony is over. Oh, and I want a big party, with a big band, a nice buffet and a delicious wedding cake.

.....Get the picture? ;)

#3: Become the best nurse ever

What can I say? I love to work in a team. I'm very social. But "nurse" is only the first base. My dream job is to become a midwife. For me, every baby is a little wonder, and I'd love to work with (future-) mom's and with babies.

#4: Have my own family

I hope I'll have my own family one day. I doubt I'll have more than two kids, but hey, never say never! I hope I will be able to have a career and children. I have nothing against stay-at-home-mom's. Far from it! I think this is a super hard job and I admire every woman who is raising her kids and stays at home. It's such a lot of work! But I also dislike the idea, that I have to study more than 4 years to get a Bachelor in nursing /science of nursery and then stay at home. Nuh-uh, I won't drag my ass to school every day for nothing.

Now to the less serious goals:

#5: Shopping without having to worry about being broke in the middle of the month

Once....just once in my life I want to go into the stores, grab the stuff I like and buy it. Without looking at the price tag. I always have this special problem: If I like something that would ACTUALLY FIT, it's too expensive or they don't have it in my size. And the stuff I could afford is....well....not exactly what I wanted.

Is there anyone else in the world with this problem?

#6: Go hiking in the scottish highlands

I guess that is easy to explain. The scottish highlands are wonderful. So peaceful. I've been in scotland several times, but I never went to a REAL hiking tour.

#7: Open an asylum for homeless cats

Oooooh yeeaah, maybe I'll end up as "the lady whose only friends are the cats" Thankfully I really like cats.

#8: Own a chocolate factory

I love chocolate. It makes me happy (and fat, but that's beside the point now...tsk.) when I'm feeling down. So, isn't it only natural that I wanna have my own chocolate factory? And, am I weird? ;)

And last but not least:

#9: Go as Marilyn Monroe to a costume party

Marilyn Monroe was an icon. My great-grandma thinks he boobs looked like melons.

Erm....ok. But one day someone will invite me to a costume party (PLEEEAAAASSSE, INVITE ME! ----> Talkin' about being desperate....) and then I'll wear this white dress she wore. And I'll try to stand somewhere where it's windy.... *sigh*

Nine goals, I think that's not bad. Yeah, some of them are pretty ridiculous, I know. But they're my future. Kind of.

My great-grandma loves my list. And I lover her for approving and being who she is.

On a mission against bitches

I'm gonna tell you about a girl I know. We were in the same class.
She and I, we're totally different. I'll give you a description, first one of me then of her.
A short description of me:

• I don't care about how rich my friends are. Nor do I care if they're popular or super pretty. These things just don't matter to me.
• I'm a quiet person. I'm not someone who likes to take the lead. As one of my teacher said, I'm a "quiet worker".
• School and education is something I take serious. I do what the teachers say. I listen during class and I do my homework (ok, except for maths :-P ). I rather learn for tests, than cheat.
• I like to go out. But not every night during the weekend. And when I go out, I rarely drink. I'm not against alcohol, I just....I can't drink that much. It's simply not my thing. And I don't smoke. Never did, never will. If people want to smoke - ok. It's their decision, not mine.

A short description of the girl I'm talking about:

• She judges people by their clothes and looks. If someone wears some older clothes which aren't the newest or coolest anymore she makes mean comments behind the persons back. She even badtalks her best friends. She's always wearing "fashionable" things. Though sometimes we all think it looks totally stupid. She think she is a model, but she really isn't. Ooooh no....
• She loves to be the center of attention. If she isn't, she'd do something to get the attention. ALWAYS. No matter what. She speaks loud and she always wants to be the boss.
• She is a cheater. There wasn't one single test, where she didn't cheat. And if someone had a bad mark, she said: "You should've learned more". And when she had a bad mark, she played it down. And during class she rarely listened.
• She goes out every weekend. And she always drinks a lot. I mean, she has the money, since her parents pay for everything. Even for her car. And for her, everyone who doesn't smoke is uncool.

So, you see, she's the complete opposite of me. Don't get me wrong, I accept everyone. If I don't like someone, I ignore the person.

But with this girl it was different. One day, I was eating lunch with my friends, when she came to me and asked if I could help her. The finals were coming and she had huge problems in english grammar. Languages are my thing and I love to learn them. So, that day she asked me if I could explain the english grammar to her. I'm not a bad person (normally) and I said I'd help her.

The next day I had a terrible headache and during the big break I went outside to get a bit of fresh air. I saw this girl sitting in the grass with her friends. She couldn't see me, I was near some trees.

But I could hear her. I told ya she has a loud voice.

"Oh god, yeah" she said, "she is such a geek. She always has good marks. I bet she's learning every single minute at home. But she agreed on helping me. That stupid bitch, haha."

My first intention was, to go over and tell her off. But then I had a better idea. An evil idea, yeah...but a good one. Just once I wanted to be a bad girl.

So, I told two of my friends about what this girl had said. And we decided to make a plan:

1. Make her think we want to be her friends and would do anything to be seen with her
2. "Help" her with the grammar. Which means; teach hear ridiculous grammar rules.
3. Sabotage her in all the other classes too!

Our mission was born: Mission 0007 !!!

We did pretty well. We tried to gain her confidence. We told her every day how increeeeeeedibly good she'd look and asked her several times how we could become as popular. I taught her weird and stupid rules. She was sure she'd make super good marks. I know, that's quite mean. But, I'm super proud of myself.

Anyways, we thought we should give the name 'Mission 0007' kind of a sense. So, during the rest of the year, our goal was to sabotage her 7 times. And that's what we did. We took like, 4 books of hers, 2 stacks of sheets and, in the end we also took her agenda.

We will always be proud of what we have done. I know, I know... it was super childish. But you know what?

I. DON'T. CARE.

Oh...nostalgia...these were fun times.